Tuesday, February 16, 2016

Counseling Family

As someone who has researched the behaviors of people for many years of her life, I find myself wanting to help more and more. I want to reach out more and more and expand my ideals and share my passions with others.


One would assume that the best place to start- to put ones wisdom and talents to good use is at home! What better way to be the biggest help you can be through family, right?

-Not so much-

Family is quite a different animal than helping friends or strangers. Well, why? For starters, sometimes family has a hard time of taking their "own" seriously. Not to say that they won't but if you come from a family that expects a "normal career" out of you then showing them your life coaching skills or any wisdom you've picked up over the years can be a challenge. I believe the reason for this isn't malicious; it is because they KNOW you, darling. They have seen you go through so many life stages, evolve and grow into a million different people. They have seen those embarrassing teenage stages and those experimental stages and even baby adulthood when you were still trying to figure out how to pay bills or write a check. Whatever it was, they came along the way and they might have a hard time grasping onto the adult, confident you!

Even if they have finally come to terms with who you are and what you choose as your path, using your gifts for family members can be dangerous. They may become prone to resenting you because they feel like "you know best". Even though you are trying to help them and KNOW how to help them doesn't mean they WANT your help. It can be hard when an older sibling or parent sees you shoot out rainbows of wisdom "seemingly" out of nowhere. It can be intimidating and down right scary. They may feel like you don't need them anymore and feeling like the roles have reversed may be quite uncomfortable. Instead of accepting they might backlash and dive deeper inside themselves.


Lastly (this is the big one) just because spiritual healing, life coaching or whatever it is you do worked for YOU does not mean it's going to work for someone else. That pretty much goes for anyone, not just family. You're pumped and excited and you want to share your passion and heal the world. Unfortunately, people don't heal the same way and it is up to you to know when to back off or to pursue. It can be hard to know exactly when to do what but it is a learning process. You don't want to push and cause more damage in the end or vice versa. At the end of the day, trying to council your family hits a little too close to home.

You can be there to listen always. In fact- I encourage it. I would approach it as a sister, a brother, a son or daughter- yes, absolutely 100% but nothing more. These are my experiences with this topic and it has never ended well. Usually I become the one to blame in the end. I try my best to stay away from counseling but I'm always there to lend an ear for them to chew on when they need it most.

If they ask me for my advice- my PROFESSIONAL, pure cut advice, I am happy to give it-

Between the hours of nine to five on weekdays. Don't worry, they already know my email.
;)


XOX